The Five Languages: Expressing Love in a Meaningful Way
As individuals, we each receive and express love in different ways. The concept of the Five Love Languages was first introduced by counsellor and author Gary Chapman in 1992. In his line of work, Chapman noticed couples struggled to feel loved despite their partners still showing love in other ways. He found there were five consistent patterns among his clients, which he termed the Five Love Languages.
Chapman discovered the importance of understanding your partner or friend’s primary love language and trying to express your love for them in this way. While many of us will relate to all Five love languages, there will probably be one that stands out the most to you (and there are many online quizzes you can take to find out which is your primary love language).
Let’s take a look into each of the Five Love Languages and how you could use them to care for your partner and friends...
Words of Affirmation.
We all love compliments and supportive words. People with this love language feel most appreciated and loved when their partner or friends shower them with kind words, compliment their outfit, or provide encouragement. You can use this love language by praising your partner for a task they completed around the house or remind them how proud of them you are. You could send them love notes with their lunch or text them at random times of the day to say you love them.
Being physically close to one another is a common love language. Hugs, cuddles, holding hands, a kiss on the cheek. These are all great ways to express your love for someone close to you, as it can serve as a powerful emotional connection.
The act of gift giving is important to those with this love language because it shows your loved one you were thinking of them. Chapman referred to this as “visual symbols of love.” People with this love language recognise the deliberate and thoughtful consideration when you take the time to pick out something they would like.
You could surprise them with an Angel Delivery. This is a great way to show you're thinking of them - the Little Moments range includes gorgeous (and delicious!) gifts and treats for Valentine's gift delivery, or the full meal hampers come with lots of pre-cooked meals and goodies. Sending a care package is a great way to ease their stress and load, and giving a gift or a treat is a great way to express your love for someone. After all - as we always say - Food is Love.
Those with this love language find meaningful time together most important and feel the most loved. They really love active listening and your full presence when you spend time together. You could express this love language to your partner by taking them out on a date night, or go on a trip together, even if it’s just a day road trip. You could have a night-in together, get takeaways, and have a deep conversation.
Acts of Service.
People with this love language really feel loved when you do helpful things for them. They appreciate your thinking of them and easing any burdens of tasks or stress. You can show this love language by running an errand for your loved one, grab groceries, hang, and fold the laundry, or cook dinner without being asked. It could even be as simple as making them a coffee in the morning. After all - it's the little things!
Davis, T. (2020). What Are the 5 Love Languages? Definition and Examples. Retrieved from: https://www.psychologytoday.com/nz/blog/click-here-happiness/202009/what-are-the-5-love-languages-definition-and-examples
Evans, O. (2022). What Are the Five Love Languages? Retrieved from: https://www.simplypsychology.org/five-love-languages.html#:~:text=These%20are%20'words%20of%20affirmation
Nguyen, J. (2020). What Are The 5 Love Languages? Everything You Need To Know. Retrieved from: https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/the-5-love-languages-explained